You’ve probably heard the words, “Baby, talk dirty to me…”, or something similar coming from the mouth of your lover or from another guy at some point in your past. And if you haven’t, trust me, it’s coming..!
Maybe you bungled a response to his request… or maybe you just ignored it and hoped he wouldn’t ask you again…
You may love the idea of talking dirty or the mere thought of it could be filling you with an anxiety that you want to run away from. However, I’m sure you, like me, completely get that guys just absolutely love it, especially Scorpio guys! But have you ever wondered, “why is talking dirty such a big turn on for him?”
Well, wonder no more as I’m about to give you the low-down on this erotic little love-play technique. Understanding why he loves to hear you talk dirty to him actually gives you a very unfair advantage over him and can get him to fantasise about you and worship you like the goddess that you are. It kind of gives you high-level ninja skills you can use to turn him into jelly in your presence.
Follow along with me here as I explain exactly why dirty talk drives men crazy!
Nice girl/Naughty girl
If you’re the kind of woman who has a ladylike presence when out in public but once you’re behind closed doors with your lover you allow all the naughty and explicit phrases he’s been longing to hear just pour from your mouth, it’s the contradiction and defiance of social norms that is a huge turn on for him.
For him, knowing that he’s the only guy who gets to see you when you’re naughty is also highly appealing. Even more so, it gives him the feeling that it is him that excites you to be so naughty, which is very stimulating for his ego.
Even if you’re not the peak of politeness and decency in public, watching you suddenly change into a naughty little she-devil only for him gives him an enormous thrill. When you put him in this state you heighten all his senses and fixate all of his attention completely on you. It’s in this state that you can get him aroused to his maximum.
It makes him feel like a sex god
When he hears you let go in a succession of moans mixed with a plethora of sexy and naughty phrases, you’re expressing to him exactly how much you’re f&^*$#g loving what he’s doing to you. Your unrestrained locutions of ecstasy let him know that he’s rocking your world.
You see, when it comes to intimacy, men are pre-programmed at a deep level to satisfy their woman sexually. This extends way back to the days of our ancestors in neolithic times. However, in the modern world, there are far too many mixed signals that both men and women give that make it difficult to know if you’re truly satisfying your partner. Talking dirty slices straight through all the murkiness and speaks directly to his primitive brain.
You disarm him with your confidence
There is nothing more utterly seductive to a guy than a woman who can use dirty talk with confidence to get what she wants from her man in bed.
Most guys are defencelessly fascinated by a woman who isn’t afraid of expressing themselves in a sexual way. He no longer needs to try to guess what he’s supposed to be doing in order to turn you on. For most guys, that can actually make sex kind of stressful, which could result in him becoming flaccid before too long. So, by you stating exactly what you want him to do to you excites him to know that he is nearing his goal of being the best lover you ever had.
Furthermore, when you talk dirty to him with confidence it shows him that you’re definitely not inhibited or uptight sexually.
Talking dirty shows your enthusiasm for sex
An enthusiastic woman in the bedroom is a massive turn on for guys. Studies have shown that an enthusiastic partner in bed is the number one ranking thing that makes guys feel deeply attracted to their partner. If you think about it, it makes total sense. If your partner is quiet in bed then it subconsciously could be saying that their either bored or distracted by other things, which definitely kills the mood. If he starts wondering if he’s actually satisfying you then it can bring up several insecurities in his mind.
When you start talking dirty to your man, you’re not only one hundred per cent present with him and in the moment, you’re also showing him that you’re enjoying it. Bringing this level of engagement into the bedroom with your partner deepens the closeness and connection that the two of you are able to experience together.
The above four reasons are signalling different chemicals in his brain, which in turn, hit the big triggers that control his sex drive. It’s amazing that there’s actually some scientific thinking behind dirty talk!
However, not all women feel completely comfortable talking dirty to their partner, and if this describes you, you’re not on your own. If you feel that you’re just too shy to talk dirty or you just want to know the exact words to say so you know you’re doing it right then I’d love to give you some pointers. The only thing I ask is that you don’t let fear get in the way of you including this fun skill into your sex life. Once you start using it, he will be ‘very’ grateful and you will be amazed at how sexy it will make you feel!
Three Easy Ways To Bring Naughty Talk Into Your Relationship
Texting is a great way to start getting into dirty talk with your partner. Not only will it make he eager to see you, you will also be able to turn him on when you’re not around, which will make him think about you all the more.
Sending a simple text like, “I just can’t stop thinking about…” accompanied with either “your naked body” or “the amount of pleasure you gave me last night” or “how bad I’m aching for you right now” are fun little ways to get your message across without being too overtly dirty with your language. This is a great place to begin.
Give him naughty feedback
While having sex, you can give him some naughty play-by-play feedback as you tell him how much you love what he’s doing to you with some detail. Telling him that you’re loving what he’s doing, that you don’t want him to stop or give him some direction on the things you want him to do next will definitely be well received.
Get into character
When talking dirty it helps to first get into character in your mind. Think of all the things your naughty vixen persona would say. Just get into that role and don’t hold back or play down the naughty words that start to pour out of your mouth.
Felicity Keith, has a program called the Language of Desire, which teaches you ways to get over any feelings of shyness you may have and gives you more than 200 dirty words and phrases that are proven to turn men on, all completely done for you. Felicity coaches you step-by-step on exactly what to say, how to behave and how to be comfortable and confident talking dirty to your man. You can find out about her program here.